Let us understand the term Super Freeze to refer to the creamiest, most delicious ice cream that can be conceived of (regardless of whether any other ice cream exists or not). The fool says in his heart that Super Freeze does not exist. Yet this very fool, in order to say this, must have Super Freeze in mind when he denies its existence. So even this fool will admit that Super Freeze exists in his understanding, although he does not understand it to exist in reality.
Hence, even the fool is convinced that something exists in the understanding: the creamiest, most delicious ice cream that can be conceived of. But surely the creamiest, most delicious ice cream that can be conceived of cannot exist in the understanding alone. For if it did, we could then go further and conceive of it existing in reality as well, which would make it creamier and more delicious – for real ice cream is surely creamier and more delicious than imaginary ice cream (as any fool can tell you). This is clearly impossible. Hence, there is no doubt that there exists an ice cream than which no creamier or more deliciosu can be conceived, and that it exists both in the understanding and in reality.
So truly do you exist, O Super Freeze my ice cream, that you can not be conceived not to exist.
[EDIT: OK, this was going to be an inside joke, but for those completely in the dark: This is a parody of Anselm’s ontological argument for the existence of God. It’s a bad argument. Click the above link to read the original argument. The primary purpose of the parody is to invoke the art of humour.]
- Kalam: Does anything at all come into existence?
- Newcomb’s Paradox: Box One or Two?
- Divine Timelessness and the Death of Jesus
- God of the Gaps?
- What “The Little Prince” can teach some philosophers (and some normal people too)